Whether you’re about to become a dad for the first time or your growing baby is about to hit double digits, every man will be delighted by the omens before entering the delivery room. Human biology has determined that your partner must carry all the heavy burdens of childbirth. This often leaves you feeling helpless, inefficient, and afraid before becoming a father.
But that’s not necessarily the case. Nadine Richardson has been a birth educator, doula, and prenatal yoga teacher for more than 20 years and is also the creator of She Births® (shebirths.com), an online prenatal class program. This program is designed to empower parents. with practical skill and compassion. He shows that with the right knowledge, you can make a big contribution in the delivery room as a partner. “You are the first generation of dads to be invited into the delivery room. Therefore, your role is much more important than before.
Here are Nadine’s tips for giving your partner the support they need and making the “magic” less stressful.
1. Being the main supporter and encouragement
“As a father, you are the main support,” said Nadine. “The delivery room will be a completely foreign environment for you. But it’s also very foreign to a woman about to give birth.
“Understand that your role is to be your partner’s advocate – ask questions and help make decisions in consultation with your care provider. Although it is also key to practical support when it comes to massage, reflexology and creating a conducive environment to work.
“Spouses can also be emotional support and ‘normalize’ – doing all of the things doulas do all the time. But it’s important to understand that as a father, you don’t have to get in the way. Intervene and play this role if you don’t feel comfortable in all three areas. – advocacy, factual, and emotional.
“Let yourself choose. Talk to your partner about what makes you comfortable and uncomfortable. It’s important that you don’t feel pressured to do things if they don’t fit your dynamic. It’s easy to hire a doula to fill that void and help you.
2. Avoiding Scary Stories Abot Becoming a Father
“Television is not a great teacher of childbirth. The hit Hollywood TV series is not what will make your birth a wonderful experience. The human brain absorbs and encodes negatives 5 times faster than positives and when you listen to one. you 23 times more likely to remember information because it’s in a narrative.
All are fascinated by the painful stories of childbirth. “The best thing you can do is turn off the television and protect yourself and your mother from the negative medical views of a traumatic birth process. Start filling yourself up with stories. Read positive stories on the She Births® blog or watch birth videos on our free app Aim your brain to a positive result, because if it can happen, if it happened to one person, it can happen to everyone.
3. Independent preparation
“Understand that the midwife and obstetrician will not be present for 95% of your births. That’s the truth:
You will work alone. And most of your work will also be done at home for most people. Better prepared for this responsibility.
“Personally, I didn’t expect that when I was in labour, I remember thinking ‘Where’s my midwife?’ He comes to check my blood pressure every half hour. I think he should hold my hand and rub my back. That’s really daddy’s job. But a lot of times no one really tells daddy. It’s their role.
4. Avoid pessimistic thinking
“As a partner, you can’t ‘fix’ the workforce. But you can help! There are many practical things you can learn, from dressing in your bedroom to relieving pain and helping you make important decisions.
“We have a little acronym that we use to help dads make decisions when a medical professional recommends something.
“We have dads who don’t even speak English as a first language and they are busy in this hospital system in big discussions about pitocin stimulation or boosting or whatever. And they just said, “Stop! Wait, let’s SIGN UP.” It can make you feel more empowered in your decision-making and result in a less disheartening outcome.
5. Enjoy All the Touches
“Your skin is the second best choice after your mother’s skin. So even after a C-section, when baby can’t be with mom, the next best place is on daddy’s chest. Take off your shirt, skin-to-skin contact. I believe what’s on the skin is potentially more important in the early postpartum period than what happens during vaginal delivery. The immunity and strength it gives babies runs deep. Don’t be afraid to get your baby out of the crib while waiting for your mom to come out after surgery.
“Don’t be shy. Say:
I wanted to go with my son to daycare and wanted to cuddle him because I knew it would help regulate his temperature and support his immunity rather than being wrapped in a completely sterile hospital blanket with no biome discretion. By all means. Please hug soon.